Preparing for Marriage

These are just some of my thoughts. I am sure more will follow.

Marriage. It is a mystery. In the seminary world, people go about it many different ways. Some date, some court, some get engaged after knowing one another for 2 months. What is the ideal? How do we get there?

Voddie Baucham Jr. is a voice in biblical marriage and family issues. In his book, What He Must Be, he talks about the importance of teaching young men and women to prepare for marriage. He calls marriage 'the preferred state'. He is not talking about men and women who have a known calling from God to serve Him in singleness. He is talking about the twenty-somethings (like myself) who delay marriage. (Let me remind you, women don't always have control over their marital status if men do not approach them, but that's a whole other issue!) Most of our parents got married in their early twenties. That is rarely true for our generation. When people that young do get married, we are somewhat shocked.

The more I look around, the more I realize how many singles there are. Sometimes I feel like the only one, but really there are plenty around. Baucham says, "If we prepare our children to be husbands and wives, and God calls and equips them toe be single, we have lost nothing. On the other hand, if we do not prepare our children to be husbands and wives, and they end up married someday, we have lost a great deal. " There is so much truth to this. Parents should be the ones who prepare their children for marriage. Some girls I know do not know how to cook because their mothers never taught them. I believe it's important for the church to step up and teach when the parents do not.

Singles need to prepare for marriage because the majority of us will one day marry. If we get too comfortable in our singleness, how much harder will it be for us to share our life with someone else? This lack of preparation makes things difficult for the single adults. Baucham says, "As a result, we have families led by men who haven't the foggiest idea what their role is or how to carry it out. We have wives who were created with a God-given need to be led by godly men, a curse from the days in the garden that puts them at odds with this arrangement, and a cultural mandate to fight against male headship." This statement is so profound. Women desire to be led by men. Deep down we want men to lead us and care for us. It helps us love him and help him if he has a plan. So what are we going to do about this? We need to teach young adults to prepare. I am preparing myself. That is all I can do right now.

Around the Bend

I am trying to write more poetry. It's a great way to give praise to God! This is a new one.

The future unknown leaves me to wonder
What is around the corner?
An outpouring of blessings await me
Just around the bend

You have always been there
I wait for You to guide me
A lifetime of joy You bring me
Your lovingkindess never ends

There is nothing to fear
The future is in Your hands
Your provisions amaze my worries
Time and time again